Pushing through
by WIWJ
Summary: I must had just blocked the season finally and premiers out of my head or something, because just like with TNPLH2, I was traumatized by the amazing sad JPF.. therapeutic post ep. Spoilers for JPF. PS.. THE RATING JUST JUMPED UP... M M M
1. get out

A/N okay, I'm not sure what's wrong with me, maybe I had just blocked the season finally and premiers out of my head or something, because just like with TNPLH2, I was traumatized by the (amazing yet..) sad JPF.. so here is my therapeutic post ep. Spoilers for JPF… of course.

The don't belong to me.. or Woody would have never sounded so incredibly cruel when he said 'Now'

(after he tells her to leave)

"_Now_." She didn't recognize this voice and it scared her.He studied her with coldangry eyes. She shook her head and started for the door, catching site of his reflection in the window as he slowly rolled his head back to watch her leave.

_To make sure I leave. _She didn't look back at him, just lowered herself into the chair by the door.

"I can't." She admitted softly. "I'm sorry."

"Jordan, you really think this is how I wanted it to go down? You telling me those things, staying with me, being here out of pity?"

She didn't say anything, she didn't look up. She just waited for him to go silent.

When she did glance up, he was facing the other way. She wiped her eyes and mumbled something to herself.

"What?" He said, a little softer this time, but still in that annoyingly detached tone.

"I said six hours ago I would have sold my soul for fifty/fifty." She repeated a little louder. "Six hours ago I thought you were going to die." She turned her head from the window and back to her hands. "Six hours ago I almost lost everything."

He was watching her now. Watching her fiddle with the hem of her shirt, watching her brush her hands up and down her pants. Her hair hung limply around her face, tears had traced little trails through her makeup, she had bit the right side of her lip until it was just a little redder than the left. He was thinking about that, about her sitting in the waiting room, raking her hands through her hair, crying and biting her lip, when he fell asleep.

He opened his eyes, slowly scanning the room for her. He watched her blurry figure back up from his side, and retreat to the chair.

"Jordan?" He said softly across the room to her. She lifted her eyes up to him, fearful and timidly. If he could have used his legs he might have kicked himself. "You're still here."

"I know.. I know.. you said get-." She started looking towards the floor, gearing up for another fight.

"..over here.." He raised his voice over hers. He watched the shift in her eyes, exhaustion, stubbornness, fear, confusion… "Come here."

She crossed the distance to him slowly, tentatively trying to anticipate his intent. He lifted his hand to her and she watched his fingers uncurl and reach across the space between them.

She brought her own up, pausing it slightly in front of his. It made him wonder if the most annoying part of this paralyses was going to be that he could no longer kick himself for hurting her. He grazed her fingers with his own, tempting her back to her previous grasp.

"You missed your date." He whispered after appraising their tangled fingers for a moment. She rolled her eyes a little.

_That's better_, he thought to himself.

"Something came up." Her voice was still low and broken, he rubbed at her fingers. Her eyes moved back to his and she slowly took a step closer. Moving her free hand to his hair and pushing her fingers back in short strokes, gauging his face for his reaction.

"Yeah?" He mumbled weakly. She nodded. His lips trembled, and she tightened her grasp.

"Are you're meds wearing off? Do you need me to-?" She was reaching for the call button with her other hand, when he grabbed it.

"I'm okay." He told her quickly. "I'm okay." He pulled her hand back down to the bed before letting it go. "When are they-?"

"Four hours." She interrupted looking back to the window. "I-I spoke with the specialist, he's really optimistic.." She adjusted her grip on his hand as he turned his head back to the wall. He rubbed his free hand back up through his hair.

"So, four hours." His voice dipped back into that despondent tone. She held her breath. Wishing they hadn't told him anything, wishing she'd been able to do it. She could have found a better way. She could have-. "I'm scared, Jordan."

She turned back towards him feeling the fear in her melt back into the pit of her stomach where it had been resting. He was still turned away, starring blankly at the wall. She brought her lips slowly to his head, making a little clicking sound as she pulled away just far enough to rest her forehead against his hair. He turned back towards her and she felt his damp face against hers. She swallowed hard. Tears from both of them today, people who never cried, both crying on the same day. She kissed his cheek. He pulled back far enough to look in her dark eyes. She brought up her hands wiping away the tears on his face with her thumbs.

"It's going to be okay." She was prepared to do what ever she had to do to make it that way. _No matter what_. She added to herself.

He was here and he was alive and nothing else mattered, not to her.

She watched his eyes close again as he pulled the edge of the sheet back, giving her access to a small corner of the bed. She took it slowly afraid to move to quickly, trying not to hurt him or not to spook him, she wasn't sure which one. He pulled the sheet back over her as she curled around his upper body. His head pressed into her shoulder and she pulled at little pieces of his hair, letting them slide out of her grasp.

"It's going to be okay." She said again feeling his hand slip possessively around her calf.

He sighed, pressing deeper into her shoulder, tightening his grip on her. For the next four hours, he was going to choose to believe her.


	2. luck be a lady

A/N.. I'm such a sucker for the 'please continue'.. so here.. this is why my one shots never stay one shots!

As much as I'd like to rewrite the whole season.. humm tempting..

If they belonged to me.. I probably would.. but sadly all I own is my computer and an obsessive compulsive personality that can only be tempered by Crossing Jordan... he he..

* * *

They'd given him "something to relax". By the looks of him, Jordan decided he was way more than relaxed. He grinned at her like an idiot. She had to admit though, it was better than the hopeless stare he'd had most of the night.

"Hey Jo?" He said drunkenly turning his head towards her.

"Hey Woods?" She shot back, feeling the sides of her mouth twitch up towards her eyes. His goofiness had always been contagious. She pulled her hand out from under his and smoothed back his hair.

"You know all that stuff that I said I wanted to hear and then you said and then I said I didn't want to hear?" Jordan widened her eyes and shook her head a little trying to make sense of the long stream of words.

"Yeah, sure." She told him. " Sure I do."

"I'm glad you said it." He shrugged his shoulders up and they fell rapidly back to there place. "There.. I said it.. I'm glad you said it and I'm glad I told you that I'm glad you.. I'm glad I.. you.." His eye brows scrunched together in confusion as he looked towards the ceiling trying to find his place again in the jumbled run on sentence. She tried not to laugh at him.

"I'm glad I said it too." She told him quietly, watching the nurses move into the room to take him back to the OR.

"Dr. Cavanaugh? Dr. Seymour will be in to talk to you before the surgery. He'll go through the procedure and answer any questions you may have."

Jordan nodded, feeling the panic rise in her chest again, she didn't want them to take him. She didn't want him out of her sight. She didn't want to be alone. He squeezed her hand, bringing he back towards his silly expression.

"It's gonna be okay?" He asked her with the faintest hint of worry. She nodded again smiling at him.

"It's going to be fine." She leaned forward to kiss his forehead, when he tilted his face up, pressing her into a full kiss, wrapping his hand around her head and holding her to him. "Well.. wow." She mumbled stumbling backwards as there lips parted and he released his hold on her.

"I am glad you said it. No matter what I say.." She looked at him for a second, her eyes taking in the sincerity of his uninhibited words. "I love you Jordan." She nodded wordlessly for the third time.

"Ready to go?" One of the nurses said looking between Jordan's look of bewilderment and Woody's heavy, doped up eyes.

"Lets go! Fifty/Fifty. Come on Papa wants to still need shoes!" He called out flapping an arm up like he was rolling dice. Jordan decided she wanted a dose of what ever they gave him. "Luck be a lady to night! Luck be a lady tonight.. Luck if you've ever been a-."

His song trailed off as they wheeled him around the corner. Jordan chuckled for a second before it turned into a sob.

_This is it_. She thought to herself. _The moment of truth_.

For the briefest of seconds, she wondered if she could do it. If it wasn't repairable, if he'd never walked again, would she be able to do it?

She wandered out into the hallway of the ICU, rubbing her arms and trying to decide where she wanted to wait for Doctor Seymour.

"NO!" She jumped when the woman screamed, turning and watching her as one of the nurses struggled to hold her up. "Please no. Please. I need him. I need him."

Jordan felt a shiver go up her spine as one of the nurses lead the hysterical woman away. Jordan watched as through the window as they turned off the monitors in the room she'd been outside of. Unceremoniously removing wires and tubes from the dead man in the bed.

She felt the fear wash over her in one nauseating wave. She could do it. She decided, no more doubt, no more fear. He was alive and she loved him. She needed him. Nothing else mattered.


	3. what was I thinking?

A/N

Must pay.. must pay for the flirting and the kissing.. must pay.. this sucks.. honestly it sucks.. so hey… lets make him pay for a chapter or two… shall we?

* * *

He felt her hands moving against his head, pushing back through his hair then up again. She ran her thumb up the side of his jaw and cupped her palm around his warm face.

"Jordan?" He felt her lips on his forehead. "Jordan?" The second was a little more seeking. He wondered why, he knew where she was, he could feel her.

"It's okay." She whispered to him softly, he felt her lift his hand into hers, her lips brushing across his ear. _Why again had he told her to leave?_

"What's wrong?" He asked breathlessly moving his face against hers.

"Nothing. Everything's going to be fine." She was lying.

"It didn't work." He realized slowly, pulling back from her. "I'm.. I'm.."

"Hey, no. It's too soon to tell for sure, but it looks like everything's okay." She brushed her cool fingertips across his face. "You just have to rest, okay? Rest." He nodded laying his cheek back against hers.

"Jordan?" He repeated. Things were hazy he wasn't sure what was going on now. He squeezed her hand firmly. "What's going on?"

"Nothing." She said softly.

"I'm confused." He told her his voice giving into his panic just enough for her to notice.

"It's the medication." She was lying. He could tell by the way she let the words slip out of her mouth slowly. Almost like she was making them up as she went along. Or as if she had to force herself to say them. He couldn't tell which.

"Liar." He smiled, his eyes cracking open a little more.

"Everything's okay." She told him again, he could feel his grip on consciousness starting to fade again. "Rest."

"Stay." It wasn't a question or a request. It was more of a plea. "Jordan I need you to-."

"You couldn't make me leave remember?" He smiled again, giving her hand another squeeze before he felt his grip loosen. The last thing he remembered was hers tightening in it's place.

* * *

"I don't understand why his fever won't come down." Jordan said in exasperation, flicking her eyes towards the doctor. "It's been two days, he's barely been conscious for a solid hour. What is this? Is it strep? Staff? Tell me what this is."

"Dr. Cavanaugh, I understand your concern but-."

"No. No, I don't think you do." She looked back towards the bed. "He looked better four days ago bleeding to death on the gurney. Now, someone better figure out what's going on before my coworkers in the morgue have to do it for you."

"Hey, you shouldn't piss her off.." Came his quiet voice from the bed. "She's mean when you…" She looked up into his heavy blue eyes, he reached out a weak hand towards her and she grabbed it. She shot the doctor a look as he backed up against the wall. "So.. you're holding a spot for me at the morgue?" She pressed her lips to his forehead, feeling his skin hot against her kiss.

"Hey you." She said softly. "Nice of you to join us."

"You're being mean?"

"You're being a difficult patient." She told him softly.

"Infection?" He said simply, slipping his gaze slowly to her dark eyes. She nodded, kissing the hand she was holding. "Will it effect my.. you know I mean.. Do I still have shot at.."

_Forget about the damn walking_! Jordan wanted to scream at him. _I'm just trying keep you alive here_!

"Woods," She started in on his hair again. It comforted her as much as it did him. "You've been moving your toes. It's fine." He smiled at her his eyes drifting in and out.

She fought the urge to tell him to stay awake for purely selfish reasons. She leaned back in her chair watching his eyes flicker open and closed like they had been for the last two days. Some times he was lucid enough to tell her to eat, or sleep, or calm down. Most of the time he just wordlessly watched her, sinking into her touch and listening to her random chatter.

She last night she'd sat there thinking about what would have happened if she'd listened to him and walked out the door. She swallowed hard at the idea of him laying here alone and confused. What was he thinking?


	4. wake up calls

"Hey." His voice startled her, she blinked her eyes a few more times before she could see his.

"How long have I been asleep?" She asked stupidly.

"Depends.. how long have I been asleep?" He chuckled, she rubbed her eyes and touched his cool cheek with a smile.

"On and off for about four days." She smiled at his astonished expression.

"Then why do I feel like I just pulled a double?" He raised his eyebrows at her.

"Morphine.. Lots of Morphine." He made a face. He didn't even like Tylenol. "Hey. It's a good thing. Pain means…an intact nervous system." She whispered the last three words in her most seductive voice. He smirked at her.

"You need to go home." He whispered.

"Again with the going?" She sighed in exasperation. He took her hand.

"You're exhausted." He pulled her fingers to his lips and kissed the backs of them.

"I'm not going to sleep at home." She informed him.

"Is it going to hurt like hell if I move about six inches to my left?" He asked her raising his eyebrow to it's highest point. She shook her head.

"Lots and Lots of Morphine." She reminded. He looked at her warily moving his body over slowly. "See?" He remade the 'but I hate Tylenol face'. "Trust me it's a good thing."

"Come on. Come here." He patted the right side of the bed, she stood up and walked around slipping in beside him.

"I'm not going to sleep here either." She challenged laying her head on his shoulder. He swept his hands through her curls until her eyes closed.

_That was just too damn easy_. He thought kissing her forehead and looking up to see Lily's smiling face outside the door.

"Hi." She said quietly looking at Jordan.

"She won't wake up. She's exhausted." He told her. "Besides she sleeps like the dead." He was relieved when Lily didn't bother to ask how he knew that.

"You look really good." Lily told him.

"So I looked really bad?" He asked watching her nod.

"You looked really bad." She laughed. "I think she looked worse though." She chucked her thumb at Jordan.

He grimaced and kissed Jordan's head.

"She sounded so much better when she called this morning to tell us your fever was down. It took you forever to respond to those antibiotics Woody." She told him in a mock scolding tone.

"I think it's the lack of spleen thing. Don't spleens have something to do with how you fight infection?" Lily shrugged.

"Not a doctor.. just play with them all day." She laughed. "Dr.'s who, by the way, are waiting for the green light to come visit you."

He grinned at that. They were the only family he had, and sometimes he wondered if they knew that. He wondered if they just tolerated him for Jordan's sake, or if they really liked him.

"Anytime." He told her.

"Good.. the guys have been a little shaken up by this. You know them.. if they'd have gotten this faster or scanned that more quickly." Woody watched her expression go somber, she looked someplace far away. "Then the vest got there." She shook her head. "But hey.. you're going to be fine."

He shot her a quick smile, thinking about what it would have been like if one of them had been shot. He remembered Bug and Cal and the mob. Probably a little like that.

"She's.." Lily looked at Jordan. "She's never going to let you out of her sight again." Woody smiled.

"That sounds pretty damn good to me." Lily's eyes brightened before she shook her head.

"Tell me why exactly it took this to get you two there?" Woody shrugged.

"First she wasn't ready then she was ready and you wanted to move on and then-."

"Wait what?" He cocked his head to the side and looked at Lily. "When was she ready?" Lily looked guilty. "Lily when was she ready?"

"The… her birthday.. she was going to ask for it back Woody." He blinked at her, shaking his head slowly. "Wow I really shouldn't have told you that." She got to her feet. "You look tired… she's gonna kill me… I need to.." She kissed his cheek and made her way to the door.

He sat there in a daze for a long time after she left. He watched the rise and fall of Jordan's chest. She meant it. It had nothing to do with the shooting.. she meant it. He reached for the phone and dialed Nigel's number.

"Nige? Yeah man I'm good. Lily said you guys wanted to know when you could come up? Sure anytime. Tonight's good. Hey Nige? Do you still have Jordan's house key? Could you do me a favor? Great… my spare key is in her silverware drawer, under the holder thingy. At my apartment in the second drawer of my dresser there's a black ring box. Can you bring that to me?"


	5. gaurds and the ring

A/N I tried to proff read this but there will be errors. My computer crashed and I had to do this on notepad.. no spell check.

* * *

It startled him when the door opened. He was trying to decide which made him a bigger idiot, not listening to her on her birthday, or trying to make her leave the hospital the night he'd been shot.

"Nice to see you awake." The nurse said quietly, bringing in a tray of semi interesting food. "It's almost nicer to see your girlfriend asleep." She nodded towards Jordan. "Now, if you think you can get her to start eating, be my guest." She shook her head. "You gave her quiet a scare, and she's a force to be reconded with that one."

"You're telling me?" Woody smiled, pulling Jordan's body closer to his own. "Your friend just got here.Tall gawky looking guy?" She chucked her finger out towards the hallway. "He's out there talking to you're personal body gaurd."

"My what?" He looked at her in confusion.

"Oh, didn't she tell you? She's got you surrounded Cowboy. 24 hour servalence." Woody shot her a cheap smile, if they'd put a cop at the door, that ment he was at risk. At risk of what? He wondered. The nurse opened the door for Nigel. "Pass your securtiy screaning?"

"Yeah." Nigel said softly shooting a toothy smile at the woman as she slipped out the door.

"All right Nige, what's going on?" He asked warily. "Why is there a cop at the door?" Nigel looked down at the floor.

"I can't tell you, Mate." He pleaded. "Jordan made us swear on our mothers." He looked at her curled up on the bed next to him. "She looks peaceful now, but you know what she'd do to me if I told you." Woody had to laugh at that, a guy as big as Nigel afraid of Jordan's tiny frame. He also understood where the man was coming from. Woody sat for a moment pondering the gaurd.

"Did you get it?" He asked finally look and Nigel again. The Brit nodded reaching in his pocket and retrieving the small box.

"Is this the ring? The mythical friendship birthday ring?" Woody smiled in response before shaking his head quickly.

"Everyone knew?" He asked. "Everyone knew and no one told me?"

"What exactly did you want us to tell you? You broke it off." Nige grinned at him in that unnerving 'you're an idiot' way.

"She said she-. Oh forget it. Give it to me." He reached out his hand as Nigel dropped the box into it. He opened it, examining the infamous ring again for himself. Nigel craned his head to see it. "Oh please like you didn't immidatly open it!" Woody snickered.

"It's quiet the rock." He said honestly. "I mean um.. in a purely friendshippy sort of way." Woody shook his head at him again before taking the ring out and slipping it onto his pinky finger. He moved on the bed until he could reach Jordan's right hand and pull it over to his chest.

The girl could sleep through a nuclear attack. Woody decided as she barely stired at his movements. He slipped the ring on her finger and smiled smuggly.

"It would look nice on the other hand too." Nigel muttered trying to act like he wasn't really paying attention.

"Nige, I want to surprise her not kill her." He smirked as Nigel raised his eye brows.

"Good point, Mate." Nige shook his head. "I should be getting back. Bug and I will be by after work." He looked at Woody's lunch plate. We'll bring something a little more edible."

"Thanks Nige." He said softly, watching his friend grin again like an idiot. It was only when he looked down and addressed someone sitting outside of Woody's veiw did he remember the gaurd.

* * *

"Hey sleeping beauty. I was begining to think you weren't going to wake up." He teased brushing the hair from her forehead as she stretched her body. She turned her face to him.

"Now you know what it feels like then." She hummed at him.

"The nurse all but ordered me to make you eat." He told her softly. "I wouln't recomend the main course, but applesauce is applesauce right?" She looked at it doubusly.

"Did you eat?"

"There was soup." He said nodding. "There was soup and you save me applesauce?" She teased. He smirked and kissed the side of her head, watching her intently as she brought up her and hands and took the spoon and cup from him. "What?" She stopped mid -bite and studied him. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You're fun to look at." He told her grinning.

"Stop it." She murmered.

"No." He laughed.

"I can't eat this if you're going to watch me." She whined lifting up the spoon and pointing it at him. A flash of something caught her eye and she stopped moving. Woody took the spoon from her and took her now still hand in his smoothing his thumb across her fingers.

"Apparently, I think too much." He said softly. "I talk when I should just shut up and listen." He met her wide eyes and waited.

She looked back at the ring and up to him again.

"Kiss me." He wasn't sure at first she'd even said anything, when her words finally registered he put his palm on her cheek and gently kissed her lips. She closed her eyes and leaned her forehead against his. "Now kiss me like you mean it. Like you did before surgury." She all but ordered. He brought his other hand up, pushing his hands back into her hair and kissed her like he ment it, like he'd always wanted to.

He pulled back and planted a safe kiss between her eyes.

"That's enough of that. I'm still weak." He teased tracing his thumb across her lips.

"How did you know?" She asked breathlessly.

"Lily was here this morning and she slipped up." He looked in her eyes. "Were you ever planning on telling me Jordan?"

"I was waiting for the right time." She said softly. "You said you wanted to move on.."

"I told you after our last run that I only..."

"I know." She grimmaced.

"You could have told me then." His voice was rising.

"You were mad." She wimpered. "And then the phone rang and then-." Her words caught in her throat and he realized she couldn't say it.

"So you picked the most in opportune time?" His voice was gentle but serious. She looked away again. "You wait until-." He apparently couldn't say it either.

"It could have been the only chance I had left!" She snapped suddenly. He flinched, she froze. Slowly he brought his hands up to her shoulders. Moving his thumbs against the hollows of her collar bone until her breathing started to slow back to normal.

"I'm sorry." He whispered before he moved back uncomfortably. Her eyes flashed in momentary panic. "It's okay." He assured her. "I'm okay. Just alittle stiff." He rolled his eyes and ran his hand over his face, feeling her hand fingering through his hair and stroking the side of his face. He moved his head towards her palm and kissed it, before pressing into it. "I'm okay." He said a little weaker this time, not wanting her to pull back her touch.

"They're probably starting to dial back the morphine a little." She decided. He felt her move back towards the edge of the bed.

"No, stay." He whispered to her in protest, suddenly tired.

"You need more room. You need to rest." She told him. "I'm not going anywhere." She slipped off the bed and helped him move back to the center. "Still okay?"

He nodded.

"Wasn't as easy as the move over." He admitted. She smiled at him, sitting on the edge of the bed. He crooked his arm aroung her waist and let it rest on her lap. She resumed her work on his hair. "Nigel and Bug are bringing dinner." He told her letting his eyes drift shut from her soft touch.

"I'll wake you up before we eat it all." She teased pausing her fingers for a moment.

"Don't stop." He mumbled half asleep already, she complied. "I am sorry, Sweetheart.. about what I said.. about.. everything."

"Hush." She told him. He nodded willing to comply. It was right before his world slipped out of his reach that he remembered what the nuse had told him.

"Jordan?" She hushed him again. "What's with the guard?" Her fingers shook for a moment before she let her hand trace down his cheek.

"Sleep." She whispered. He slept.


	6. the girlfriend

A/N

This is my nice story.. I'm struggling to keep it there. because there is no Lu, no JD.. no Woody taken over by pod people.. Just them.

* * *

"I don't know how to tell him." She whispered, holding the phone facing away from him. "He's going to want to know about the gaurd and I'm going to have to tell him and I don't know how to tell him."

Her confession came out in one breathless stream. She had to gasp at the end of it.

"_Jordan. I agree it's going to be difficult but you have to be honest with him. He deserves to know."_

"Thank you oh so much for the advice, Howard, but I'm looking for suggestions on my delivery." She hissed.

"_I don't know Detective Hoyt as well as-."_

"You could always try 'Hey Woody I've got to tell you something.'" She jumped at the sound of his voice, turning slowly to meet his gaze.

"I've gotta go." Jordan let the phone drop away from her face. "Hey Woody I've got to tell you something."

"Riggs escaped." He pressed his lips together when she nodded.

"How-?"

"I'm a cop Jordan." They stood there staring at each other before she slowly slipped over to the bed and sat down in the chair. He took her hand and in both of his. Tracing over his ring with both thumbs. "Are you okay?"

"You're worried about me?" She laughed. "This guy almost killed you."

"He knows what you look like Jordan." Woody shook his head in concern. "You were right not to leave here. He knows who you are and that you're my _girlfrien_d. Who knows-." He stopped furrowing his eyebrows at the smile on her face. "What?"

"You've never-. You called me your-." He felt her fingers tighten around his.

"Come on, Jo." He whispered, not even trying to surpress his grin. "It's not the first time you've been called my girlfriend."

"It's the first time I've ever been called that by you." She lifted her eyes to his face.

"How was it?" He teased. She huffed out an embarrased sigh.

"I think I can live with it." She told him, her voice slipping into his favorite tone. The tone she used when he'd gotten something right. He winked at her and smiled.

"Kiss me like you mean it." He told her slyly, tugging at her arm.

"You're still weak." She said in mock concern, giving him a soft kiss.

"I'm feeling stronger." He reached his hand up and put it on the back of her head and kissed her hard. "See?"

"I see." She said softly, sitting on the side of the bed. "Good thing too" He raised an eyebrow. "You start physical therapy tomorrow."

He rolled his eyes giving her one last kiss before pushing her back from him.

"Tease." He accussed, watching her eyebrow rise and fall in what may have been the sexy move he'd ever seen. "Oo.. Big tease."

"Work hard." She told him, he grinned again, before his face became serious again. "Get better."

"Who's at the door?"

"Matt and Christina are taking turns during the day." She whispered. "Winslow was here last night. I think Annie's coming tonight."

"I'm being guarded by detectives?" He grinned, rolling his eyes. "A little bit of overkill, don't you think?"

"You're a hero." She told him batting her eyelashes.

"For getting shot?" He laughed and she shrugged.

"Police officers are a strange breed." She shook her head. He squinted his eyes shut, shaking his head now. "You're a great guy. People love you."

"Really.. like who?" He hummed.

"Winslow and Seely for sure." She smirked.

"Anyone else?"

"Like?" She brushed her hands through his hair.

"Like my girlfriend?" He loosly wrapped his fingers around the hand she still had on the bed.

"Oh. Her." She nodded slowly.

"Yes her."

"She loves you." She told him leaning to his lips and kissing him sweetly. "She definatly loves you."

"Good."


	7. is she for real?

A/N Fluffy Lu bashing chapter.. couldn' t help it... hope it makes you all smile.

"Detective Hoyt?" Jordan's eyes lifted from the book she was reading an took in the blonde standing in the doorway.

"Oh. Um… no." She slipped off of the bed and walked towards her. "Jordan Cavanaugh. I'm his… girlfriend." She tried to stop grinning like a fool every time she said that. "He's in physical therapy." The blonde nodded.

"I'm Detective Simmons, the new criminologist?" She stuck out her hand. "Dr. Stiles said he was going to let you know I was-."

"No.. no of course, Dr. I'm sorry. I was just expecting a-." Jordan shook her hand.

"Man?" Jordan nodded. "I know, Lu right? It's Tallulah."

"I understand. Jordan doesn't exactly scream 'ovaries' either." Jordan grimaced at her own words shaking her head. "Sorry. I haven't been getting much sleep lately."

"I'm sure." The woman nodded, turning towards the opening door. Woody looked like he'd just run twenty miles.

"Hey.. Still feeling smugly strong?" Jordan whisperedas the nurse wheeled him in. He made a face at her, she ran her fingers down his cheek.

"I'll let you take Mr. Sunshine here Dr. Cavanaugh." The nurse smiled pushing the chair into the room. "I'll be back."

"Oo.. You're making friends." She said softly pulling the chair closer to the bed. "Ready?"

"Who's she?" He shot a fake smile at Simmons.

"She's the new criminologist. Stiles sent her over remember?"

"You're the new detective?" He raised an eyebrow at her, looking down at her shoes. "Nice heels. Those are perfect for a crime scene."

"He's usually a very nice guy." Jordan told her apologetically, before looking back at him. "Ready?"

"As I'll ever be." He grunted letting her pull him to his feet and hold him in place. "Son of a-." He bit his lip leaning into her. "Okay go."

"Give yourself a minute." She whispered softly. "Ready?" He nodded and she supported his weight while he turned his back towards the bed. "Okay. Okay.. Give yourself another minute. It's not a race."

"You can't possibly hold me up much longer, Jordan." He muttered.

"I'm fine." She told him. "Just wait until you're ready." He nodded pausing for a few more seconds. She felt his weight start to drop away towards the bed wincing with him when he hit the pillows. She ran her hand through his hair. "Okay?"

He nodded, watching her slowly lift his legs and move them out in front of him. He grimaced as his back twisted into the right position.

The nurse reappeared and handed Jordan a syringe.

"Wanna do the honors?" She asked, Jordan smiled and took it from her, tightening her grip on his bicep and pressing the shot into his deltoid. He gave her a nasty look. "Baby." The nurse teased as Jordan handed her the empty syringe and sitting beside him on the bed.

"Jordan?" He whispered to her.

"Woody?"

"Remember how I said I hated morphine?" She nodded. "That was crazy talk." She grinned at him. He shot a glance at the immaculate blonde. "That's why she's here, huh?"

"If now's a bad time.."

"No. I'm sorry.. I'm not a very good patient." He told her. Jordan snickered and ran her hands through his hair. "Jordan's right, I'm usually a very nice guy. Now's fine." She nodded and looked at Jordan.

"I'll go check in with Santana." She said, getting the message.

"You don't have to go." He told her softly, looking at Simmons. "She doesn't have to-."

"Oh come on. You can talk about what a shrew I am." She leaned down and kissed him. "I won't leave Christina's sight. I promise." He nodded, letting her pull away, reluctantly. He was still looking worriedly at the door long after it had closed.

"Your girlfriends a doctor?"

"She's the AME." He told her.

"Wow. She's the one everyone warned me about?." He nodded at her. "How long have you two been together?"

"Define together." Woody smirked.

"Sounds complicated?" She cocked her head to the side. "These kind of things tend to make things even more complicated."

"Jordan and I are fine." He shot her a fake grin.

"You seemed worried she was going to leave?" She raised her eyes.

"I'm worried that she's-." He stopped himself and gave her an incredulous look. "Wow.. You're good. Right to the source, huh?"

"The source?" She sat in a nearby chair.

"Yeah. Right to it." He shook his head. "Riggs is out there, I'm worried he'll get to Jordan. Hurt her like he hurt me. And somehow that all twists itself around into a fear of loosing Jordan?" He smiled. "Which is really just a manifestation of my own fear of mortality right?"

"Wow… You're good." She told him, smiling.

"But you see you're wrong! That's not why I'm afraid of loosing Jordan!"

"Enlighten me!" She raised an eyebrow.

"No thanks." He starred at her.

"So. You got shot." She started again.

"Yep." He raised his eyebrows at her. "How does that make me feel?"

"Do you have to be in control of every conversation, Detective?" Woody scoffed at her.

"Yeah… not so much. You need to spend some more time with my girlfriend."

"And we're back to the girlfriend!" She tossed her hands playfully in the air. "She must have really done a number on you."

"You have no idea Detective." Jordan said from the doorway. Woody's eyes shot to her. "You guys are getting kind of loud. Unless you want Santana and the entire nurses station to know your.. Our.." She looked at him significantly. "Deepest darkest secrets…"

"I think we're done." Woody smiled at her, and she grimaced.

"Woods, Howard really thought-."

"I'll talk to Howard then." He cut her off. Simmons raised her hands and walked towards the door.

"Nice meeting you both." She said coolly.

"Invest in loafers!" Woody shouted after her, Jordan looked at him like he was crazy.

"What was that?"

"I don't know. I just didn't like her." He shook his head in confusion. "I didn't want her in the middle of things with you and me." He rubbed his chest in confusion. "It was almost like déjà vu."

Jordan made a face at him.

"You thought Blondie there was a threat to us?" She kissed his forehead. "Must be the morphine."


	8. backsliding

Jordan couldn't stand it anymore. She had been standing in the doorway watching Woody be an ass, with a mixture of amusement and sympathy. However now the was sinking into her stomach and pooling into plan concern.

"Look I said I can't!" He snapped at the physical therapist, his arms shaking the bars in an attempt to hold up his large frame.

"I'm just asking you to try."

"And I'm asking you to leave me the hell-."

"Hey, Hey rein it in Detective!" Jordan yelled over him before he said something he'd regret. She looked at the physical therapist with an apologetic nod and the man shot her a knowing look. Probably not the first time he'd been yelled at, she thought, but it just wasn't Woody. "Can we have a minute?"

He nodded and walked across the other room to his charts.

"What was that?" She said softly moving her hand across his sweaty hair.

"Nothing." He muttered jerking back in what she was sure was supposed to be an indignant way. He only succeeded with a half hearted look of angst.

"Wow, you sound like me. Wanna try again?" He looked down, she tousled his hair again, trying to keep the mood lighter than either of them felt. "Woody? Hello? Are you in there?"

He pinched the bridge of his nose, his body pitching awkwardly forward in an attempt to remain balanced between the bars. She absently reached out her arm to his waist to steady him. His hand came down hard on her shoulder and she braced herself against his weight. He tried to shift some of it to his other arm. She felt it give slightly before he forced it back up again.

"Hey there Big Guy. ." She tried not to sound panicked. She knew by the way the physical therapists head bobbed up she had failed. He started across the room to them, until she held up her free hand to stop him before tightly wrapping it around him. "Can you take a few steps back if I help you?" She whispered to him. He shrugged weakly burrowing her head into her shoulder. "Try. Right foot first." She instructed in what she hoped was a calm voice. She saw the PT push the wheelchair closer to where they were, holding his arms out ready to catch if Woody suddenly dropped towards him. Jordan shot him a quick smile of appreciation for restraining the urge to help them.

Using all of Jordan's strength and the bar for support they managed to make the three strides back to the chair. He closed his eyes and tried to back up only to find himself unable to move from between the bars. He shot his eyes up to hers in burning defeat.

"A little help here?" He said angrily. She raised a confused eyebrow at him and he looked back down at his lap before slamming his open palm into the bar beside him. "Damn it!"

Jordan waited for him to look up at her before lifting up her leg and pushing the chair firmly enough with her foot to send it back over the small ledge Woody hadn't been patient enough to motivate. Once the chair had cleared the small speed bump it rolled back a few more inches. Their eyes met for a second, before Woody's head bobbed down.

"Can I go now?" He whispered, tilting his head towards the Physical Therapist.

"We can be done." The man said flatly. Woody tried to back up before he brought his trembling hands from the wheels to the arms of the chair. He looked back at Jordan.

"Jor could you-?" She nodded, walking towards him, stopping in front of the chair.

"What's wrong?" He looked down until she touched his cheek.

"Can we not talk about this here?" His voice was almost pleading. She nodded, wordlessly pushing him back to his room.

* * *

"Look, I'm just asking for an MRI." Jordan tossed her head back.

"Dr. Cavanaugh, there hasn't been anything suggesting Ostemyelitits."

"Except for an increase in pain, weakness and loss of mobility, previous infection, a gun shot wound to the abdomen. Any of that ring a bell?"

"Dr Cavanaugh-."

"I want the damn MRI." Jordan tossed her hands into the air. "Just do the damn MRI." The doctor nodded her head and walked out of the room. Jordan looked at the nurse and the physical therapist before walking back into Woody's room.

"Hey Baby." She grinned, he frowned at her.

"I'm dying." He said flatly. She.

"Woody." She laughed.

"I was a jerk and you're being nurturing. I'm defiantly dying." She moved to the bed.

"You're not dying." She sat down on the edge grimacing with him. "Sorry."

"According to you I'll live." He smiled.

"They are going to take you for an MRI though."

"Jordan." He whined.

"It's no big deal." She moved her hand along the sheets.

"It's more tests." His self pity was palpable.

"Tests are the first step in fixing the problem." She rolled her eyes.

"Jordan, I'm tired and sore and my head hurts." He sulked at her. "I don't want a damn MR-."

"Then you should have told me something was wrong when you first noticed." Her voice was harsher than she'd meant it to be. She watched him lower his gaze. "Sorry."

"No you're right." He said softly. "I'm sorry, Sweetheart. I know I'm a big pain in the ass.."

"I just want you better." She reached out and took his hand in hers. "I want you back up to par Detective." She leaned over and kissed his lips, moving her hand across his face.

"Jor.." He must have caught the look of fear on her face. "This thing you think I have-?"

"Lets just get through the MRI."

"Jordan." Her lips trembled, she shook her head. "Hey, Sweetheart."

"You're going to be fine. It'll be fine. I'm just tired. It's going to-." Her voice dissolved into a sob. He pulled her to him. "You're going to hurt your-."

"Shh. It'll be fine remember?" He soothed.

"This isn't good for-." Despite her protest she wasn't moving.

"Holding you will always be good for me." She whispered into her hair.

"I'm sorry. I'm freaking you out. You really will be-."

"I believe you." He told her. "You're just tired and stressed out and I'm not helping."

She snuggled up to him.

"You're helping now."


	9. bracing for the truth

Jordan held up the MRI results, turning her head back too the team of doctors standing around her. She shook her head.

"Oh my God." She whispered, in awe of what she found on the report.

"Dr. Cavanaugh. There was nothing indicating-." She put up her arm.

"Excusses won't help him." She muttered. She'd have time for them later. She'd have time to seek them all out and hit them with her wrath when he was better. "What are you going to do to help him?"

"IV antibiotics, along with spinal immobilization."

"Bracing?" The man nodded. Jordan rolled her eyes, he was going to take that well. She thought sarcastically. "What's his sed rate?"

"Holding." She thought she saw the man wince at her when he said it. _Good, fear me_, she decided.

"But not dropping." She didn't try to hide the contempt in her voice. "How long are you going to let him go without surgery? He doesn't have a spleen."

"We hope to know more after the first round of antibiotics." She nodded, begrudgingly. "I'll go in and talk to him now."

"No." She said sharply, she wasn't going to let the professor of doom tell him anything. She was still kicking herself for the fifty/fifty odds they'd given him before she had a chance to soften the blow. "I'll tell him. I'll ask you any questions he has. You? You don't speak to him."

The man nodded.

"Force to be reckoned with." The nurse mumbled smiling to Jordan as she walked by her.

* * *

"Okay." Jordan smiled walking over to the side of the bed, wiping his hair back from his forehead. "So, I was right. Not that anyone should ever doubt my knowledge." He smiled weakly at her watching her eyebrows rise and fall. "So know we know what to do. No biggie." 

"Don't lie." He told her breathlessly, watching her face.

"I'm not." She told him, leaning down and kissing his forehead.

"You're being too nice." She smiled at him.

"So, normally I'm mean? That's the message you're sending?" He smirked at her annoyed tone. If she was annoyed, it wasn't that bad, he figured.

"Not mean." She watched him try to be motionless. "Not so nice."

"Is the morphine helping at all?" She whispered tenderly, brushing her finger up his cheek. "You hurt."

"Yeah." His face twitched into a smile.

"Yeah you hurt or yeah it's helping?" She was worried. That _wasn't_ good, he thought.

"Both." He closed his eyes. "Jordan?"

"Hum?" She pressed her hand firmly to his chest, feeling his heart beat under her hand.

"I'm really tired." He could feel her draw closer when he told her this.

"I know. It's okay." She ran her fingers through his hair, his felt his body relax a little. "It's normal."

"Jor?" She kissed his forehead again, pausing over him for a minute. He struggled to open his eyes.

"Woody, rest."

"It's bad." It wasn't a question and they both knew it. This was the worse he'd felt yet.

"It'll get better. I promise." She told him softly. "They know what to do now. They're going to put you in an immobilizer." His eyes opened watching her register the look of fear in them. "It will make you feel better."

"How long?"

"I don't know." She bit the inside of her lip, he caught her.

"You're scared." He told her. "That scares me."

"Don't worry. We can fix this." He nodded slightly wincing at the effort. "Hold still." She told him, pressing his head against the bed. "I'm going to have them up the morphine." She said absently, reaching for the call button.

"I'm alright."

"Yeah. Now. They're about to come in here, roll you over, sit you half way up and strap a brace on you." His face made her smirk. "You're gonna want more morphine."

"What if it doesn't work?" He asked quietly.

"The morphine?" She looked towards the door waiting for the nurse.

"No the brace." He was familiar with the abilities of the morphine.

"Woah. Cart ahead of the horse." She forced a laugh.

"Avoiding." He accused.

"Annoying." She giggled.

"I love you." He lifted his hand slowly towards her. She took it, tracing her fingers across his palm. She watched his eyes widen as they shot to their hands.

"It's normal." She whispered. "It's okay. It's okay." She felt his fingers weakly squeeze her own. She squeezed back hard. "Numbness and weakness are both normal."

His breath started to slow back down. Jordan turned as the nurse came in.

"Can we up his morphine?" She looked at the chart and nodded, wandering back out to find the doctor.


	10. you must remember this

**A/N **

**LOL at your reviews.. yes I'm still mad. I won't be un-mad until this Lu nonsense is done and he explains his happy (you know what)! I'll explain the medical jargon here really fast. he has a spinal infection that can easily become serious.. gunshot victims who have abdomonal wounds that end up involoving the spine do get them.. but they are rare and hard to see coming. However with out a spleen.. he's at a much higher risk.. if it gets worse.. he could have perminant damage..**

* * *

There was buzzing. 

"Jordan? Wake up Luv."

_Good she's sleeping, _Woody mused as the buzzing around him became conversation.

The room was full when he opened his eyes, moving his still gaze around for her.

"What happened?"

_Jordan.._

"His temps at 104. A huge degree of Myelopathy. He's lost location of everything, spasticity in his legs."

_And that doesn't sound good, Nige..._

"Why didn't you wake me up?"

_She's scared, that's bad.. bad.. bad.._

"It just happened. Five minutes, maybe."

_Wait?_ _Nigel's here?_

She moved over to the bed, touching Woody's cheek. It was a familiar look he gave her, a semi conscious very confused look. He watched her force a smile, touching his forehead.Her cool fingers pulled back, instinctively. Her eyes clicked up to the doctor moving feverishly around him.

"You're taking him now? Like this?" Jordan's voice was too fast.. too low.

_Scared.. _

"Like this? He's too weak, he-." She continued to sputter.

"I'm trying to prevent permanent spinal damage, Dr. Cavanaugh."

"What is it with the-?" She muttered.

_Permanent.. _

"You feel certain that he is strong enough for-?" She didn't sound too certain.

"We have to act fast.."

"I am not going to let you put his life at risk to-."

_She's mad_.

"His life is already at risk."

"Jordan! You know this is what needs to be done, Luv." He could see Nigel now, standing behind her. "Let them take care of him."

"I-." The nurse was handing her the pen and clip board.

_What the hell-?_

She looked at him as she signed the form, dropping her lips to his. "I love you. It's going to be fine. I love you."

_I love you too_...

Her lips were replaced by a mask, he felt her hands slip away and his word went dark

* * *

"Okay." His raspy voice made her jump, she looked at Jordan's sleeping form. "So, I'm guessing I'm alive." 

"Hey." Lily wandered over to him, turning back towards Jordan who was asleep in a chair on the other side of the bed.

"Don't wake her." He was almost begging, Lily nodded and found his hand. "How long was I out this time?"

"On and off?" She asked.

"I don't remember being on." He smiled.

"You don't remember?" Lily shook her head. "But I already picked out the pony you promised to buy me." Her grin spread across her face, her eyes getting squinty.

"We'll talk about it later." He chuckled. "How long Lily?"

"You're surgury was five days ago." She told him. "You've been in and out for a few days now. Mostly out."

"I don't remember anything." He rubbed his hand over his face, then looked at it wairly. He lifted his left leg a half and inch off of the bed, wincing a little. "Well.. guess I'm not paralized. Was I talking while I was..?"

"Only to Jordan. No matter if she was in the room or not." She fanned herself with her hand. "You are a very.. passionate-."

"Lily give the poor guy a break will ya?" Garret Macy said from the doorway,Lily glanced at Jordan. She didn't move. "You just said her name, something about what you wanted to hear. Oh, and you apologized about a thousand times."

"Super. Thats just-."

"What ever you did?" He shot a glance at Jordan. "She's over it."

"So. Who wants to tell me what's wrong with me?"

"Nothing." Garret shrugged. "You're just about good as new, six little pins and two long rods later. You'll be doing the Macarana before you know it."

"No one does the Macarana anymore Garret." Lily rolled her eyes. "It's not 1990."

"I'd pay Money to watch you do it Dr. M." Woody joked. "Back to PT?"

"Probably in the morning." He smiled at him.

"I just woke up." He whined.

"You're fever broke last night. They may even have you on the shedule for tonight.."

"Ha Ha.."

"You do want to dance at your wedding don't you?" Macysmirked, Woody wrinkled his forehead. "I may have not been completely honest when I told you all you said was her name.."

"I asked her to-?" He whispered, Lily nodded. "And she said-?" Lily nodded again. He looked at Jordan, his eyes falling on her left hand, where his ring was now securly attached. "Are you kidding me?" Lily shook her head. "Super, just.. she says more than I ever hoped to hear.. and I remember none of it."


	11. if I only had a brain

"Jordan?" Lily shook her a few times before she stirred. "Hey. Jordan?"

She made a noise and looked at Lily in irritation.

"Fine. I'll just go back to sleep then." He said flatly.

She opened one eye, taking him in.

"Hi." He said softly as her face broke into a slow grin.

"Hey." She moved towards him rubbing her eyes. "How you doing?"

"Better." He put his hand to her cheek. "You okay?" She nodded reaching her fingers up and lacing them with his.

She leaned over and pressed the call button, feeling his fingers tracing the outline of her _engagement_ ring with his fingers. He gave her a look before shooting a nasty smirk towards the button.

"They wanted you to have CT Scan when you woke up." She explained. "They want to make sure you still have a brain."

"They found out you wanted to marry Jordan and got nervous." Garret smirked. She watched Woody's expression. He moved his hand over the ring again smiling softly at it then smiling at Garret.

"Hey there Casanova's awake." Jordan's favorite nurse called from the door. "How you feeling Hot Stuff? Ready for CT?"

She watched Woody grimace,

"He's ready." She told her chuckling at him.

* * *

She was asleep again when they wheeled him back from CT. He wondered how much sleep she'd lost over him.

"You want help getting into bed?" He shook his head at the nurse.

"I'm just going to sit here for a while." He told her.

"Buzz if you need me." She walked off as he nodded again.

Woody looked at her left ring finger. Shaking his head slowly back and forth.

_My best bet is to play it off like I remember everything. _

He decided watching the steady rise and fall of Jordan's chest.

He still didn't know how this had happened. He still couldn't for the life of him remember it happening.

He'd asked Jordan Cavanaugh to marry him and she'd said yes?

He rolled his eyes and looked at the ceiling. She was going to kill him.

"Hey.."

"It's my future wife." He said softly turning his head in the direction of her tired voice.

"Forget it, Hoyt you're busted. Lily couldn't stop laughing long enough to tell me so Garrett did." She grinned at him.

"I'm sorry." He whined. "Believe me when I say I wish I could-."

"It wasn't that spectacular. You mumbled something about needing me and liking Jello and then you moved the ring to my left hand and said 'How bout Vegas?'" She laughed at his horrified expression. "You saved all the really racy stuff for Lily's shift." She raised her eyebrows at him teasingly.

"And you want to marry me?" He groaned, she leaned over and kissed him.

"Yeah." He was startled by the certainty in her tone. "But I'm not a big fan of Jello."

"Sorry Jordan. That's a deal breaker." He said flatly before kissing her again. "Jello and I are a packaged deal."

"How was CT?" She said after rolling her eyes all she could at his Jello joke.

"I have a brain."

"They were pretty sure you did, but you did ask me to marry you so.. "

"Ha ha ha." He traced his finger around his face. "You said yes."

His voice was soft, he shook his head slowly.

"You're surprised?" He met her eyes briefly before looking back down at her hands.

"A little."

"Do you feel used?" She teased. "Like I took advantage of you?"

"Sweetheart? You can take advantage of me anytime you want." He looked up at her now grinning.

"I know, you gave Lily some really good ideas." Her eyes sparkled at him as he grimaced again.

"Oh God." He moaned. "I don't even want to know."

"No you don't." She laughed taking his face in her hand and pulling his lips to hers again. He kissed her. His fiancée. If he hadn't been seriously involved with her lips, he might have shaken his head again.


	12. Are you strong enough to be my man?

"Look Jor, No hands." He held his arms up over his head, pleased by his steadiness. 

"Now take a step." Jordan had to bite her lip to keep from laughing at the terrified expression that crossed his features when the Physical Therapist made the request.

"I'm standing unassisted. Isn't that enough for one day?"

"You wanna dance at your wedding?" He asked. Woody looked at Jordan and nodded.

"Can I wait until she's not here? I'd rather her not be her when I fall face down into the mat." He mumbled.

"Hey no fair." Jordan whined.

"I won't let you fall Detective." He gave John the PT a curious look and then shot a quick one back at Jordan. "Not in front of the Missus."

"You want me to turn around?' She grinned he rolled his eyes. "You can do this." He raised an eyebrow. "You can."

He smiled at her and tentatively took a step forward. Then another until he'd reached the end of bar.

"Told you." She swallowed hard to keep the tears at bay, forcing down the lump in her throat.

"Wanna give it a go? I could swing you around the dance floor a few times." He winked at her with a sly smile.

"Maybe next week." She decided closing her eyes.

"It's a date."

"Speaking of? Have you two set one?" Woody smiled at Jordan.

"When can I get the hell out of here?"

"When I get you on crutches for longer than twenty minutes." John said frankly. "And standing unassisted for twenty."

"The day after that." He told the man his eyes never leaving Jordan's. He was amazed by the total lack of panic.

* * *

"It's amazing what seeing the person you count on most in this world, the man you love, bleeding to death on a gurney can do for you're ability to identify situations that should actually call for panicking." She told him when he confronted her later as they sat on his bed eating Chinese take out.

The rehab center was nice. It was like a hotel. Well a hotel with a very strenuous and very mandatory work out policy. It didn't have visiting hours, or nutrition guidelines or hospital beds though.

Just personal courtesy rules, take out menus and a large queen size bed with an optional guard rail which Jordan pulled into place each night when he fell asleep. He pretended not to notice and she let him.

"You love me."

"What was your first clue? My ring? Agreeing to marry you? Or the fact that I say it every freaking hour like clock work?" She laughed.

"None.. It was how you looked at me when I panicked about the Montgomery case. Like you wanted to fix it."

"I did want to fix it."

"You did fixed it."

"_That_ was your first clue?"

"And my first clue should have been?'

"How 'bout half a dozen looks somewhere between "You don't have to ask for my help Jordan, I'll give it to you. I can be your friend" and "Sorry isn't going to cut it. He could have killed you"  
He was looking at her now. Thinking about Redding.. thinking about her on the roof.. he'd known he loved her before that. He'd known about five minutes after 'do you like this tie..' but he never though she'd-."

"Where did you go?" She asked self consciously, looking at his pensive face. "Hey? Woody?" He blinked back at her. "What?"

Reaching over his still too slow legs he pulled the carton of Kung Pow towards him and put it on the nightstand. With every ounce of rehab strength he could muster he crawled towards her completely un-seductively and pressed his lips to hers.

"I love you." He told her softly. "So much." She smiled at him and started to open her smart mouth. "Somewhere between 'do you like this tie?' and 'no'." Her lips were trembling slightly more than his arms. She brought her hand up and smoothed it over his hair softly pressing him down to the bed and moving herself against him. He kissed her hard messing with the buttons on her blouse.

"Still weak." She reminded him muffled by his lips and putting her hand over his fingers.

"Not that weak." He reclaimed her lips.

"Not that strong."

"I beg to differ." He said in an almost cocky tone, pulling her hips to his and letting her survey the evidence of his _strength _first hand.

"Woody..." She was worried and he knew it.

"I just want to touch you." He whispered in her ear bringing his lips to her neck. "I'm okay. We won't let it go further than you want it too. I just want to touch you, Jordan."

"How the hell am I supposed to argue with that." She sighed pressing her cheek to his. He heard her sniff back a whimper.

"Jordan it's okay."

"I'm scared."

"I'm okay." He said softly. He'd managed to get the buttons undone and was pulling back her blouse. "Sweetheart, I'm okay." She took a sharp breath when he moved his fingers across the silky fabric of her bra. Her eyes shot open to find his. "I'm okay."

She pushed her hands up under his shirt and smoothed her hands across his scarred abdomen. He pulled his shirt off and took her hands in his and helped her trace them.

"See? All better."

She let her hand trail down further, tracing over the draw string of his pants and slipping lower, she heard his breath catch. She watched him intently, her eyes never leaving his.

She took her other hand from his and pulled the tie on the string loose before moving her hand inside and running her fingers up his length.

"Still okay?" He heard the smallest tease in her honest question as he nodded mutely, tracing a finger around the smooth cup of her bra. "You wanna take it off?" He nodded, gasping again as she pushed his pants away and her hand circled him completely.

"I can't reach it." He said playfully. She dipped her head down kissing the bullet sized scar before moving her mouth lower. His fingers struggled with the clasp. "Jor.."

He felt her back tense.

"No.. I'm fine.. I'm more than fine I'm.. oh god.. I'm more than fine..." She moved her head back towards his face moving her hand against his new slickness as he finally snapped the clasp and the fabric fall away from her body. "You're.. I love you."

She saw the tears in his eyes before she felt them in her own. Moving down to nestle beside him as he explored her. He moved her own pants away with out much problem and she found out his fingers were also quite strong.

He relished each little sound she made and the way her body shook under his touch. Wordlessly he took the pillow from the top of the bed and put it behind him before rolling her over him.

He kept her eyes, letting her know he was still alright. He put his hands on either side of her hips and guided her to where he wanted her to be. He might not be able to move himself, but he could move her.

"I love you Jordan." He told her again. The tears were on her cheeks now as she leaned forward and kissed his forehead before slipping her mouth into his.

They made love for the first time, surrounded by fortune cookies, packets of hot red pepper and soy sauce, being totally oblivious to that.


	13. without saying a word

"I have one thing to say." Woody said softly running his hand across his wifes face with a quirk of his lip. "Thank God you don't listen."

The crowd laughed with him, and Jordan rolled her eyes in her long white dress.

"If she ever listened.. which she doesn't... We wouldn't be here today. Thankfully Jordan knew what I needed. Thankfully she didn't listen. It'd like to think we'd have gotten here anyway, but it wouldn't have been today." He swallowed hard, tilting the microphone away from his mouth and kissing her softly. "I'm glad it's today."

He handed the microphone back to Bug and let Jordan lead him onto the dance floor.

I_t's amazing how you can speak right to my heart  
Without saying a word, you can light up the dark  
Try as I may I could never explain  
What I hear when you don't say a thing _

The smile on your face let's me know that you need me  
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me  
A touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall  
You say it best when you say nothing at all

All day long I can hear people talking out loud  
But when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd  
Old Mr. Webster could never define  
What's being said between your heart and mine

_The smile on your face let's me know that you need me  
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me  
A touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall  
You say it best when you say nothing at all_

Jordan Cavanaugh Hoyt was dancing with her husband a year to the day of his shooting. A year to the day of 'Get Out'. A year to the day that they debated whether he would ever walk again. Now,he was dancing. He was her husband. 'Get out' was a joke. 'Get out' was a memory. She didn't know where the bravery of that moment came from. She didn't know what propelled her to hold her ground.

But she was glad she'd kept pushing until she'd gotten through.


End file.
